Some of these lessons were learned over a long time, others have been with us through from the beginning. Nothing here is unique, there are books and people filled with great advice, and all of these can be found in the Bible in some way. These are some of the lessons that have seen us through thus far. Obvious disclaimer (especially if you know me): I am not a perfect husband by any stretch, I have plenty of stuff to work though and I can only thank God for my wife's patience.
- Divorce is not an option - It's become too accepted, and if you agree to never allow the "D" word to come up in conversation, at least you know there will always be light at the end of the tunnel.
- Do not let the Sun go down on your anger - (Ephesians 4:26) This was given to us on our wedding day and it is hard to not hold onto your anger but starting a day with a fresh start is a great way to go.
- Your marriage has enemies - Satan, pride, and ego. You have to realize it first then you won't see you wife as your enemy. Overcome these by standing strong in Christ. Don't be so intent on getting your way, it's not worth it. I've found the only way to overcome my pride is to serve my wife like crazy (Ephesians 5:25). What that looks like for my wife is different for yours.
- Before you think about your partner's faults, think about all of yours they're putting up with.
- Be grateful when she teaches you something that can be improved about yourself. Luther said, "Marriage is a school for character" and God will use your partner to conform you to His image.
- If you find yourself having a huge fight about something silly (in our case it was the ripeness of a banana). Take a step back, and laugh. Then work out the real problems as a team.
